'Suits" Star And Royal Wedding Guest Patrick J. Adams Apologizes For "Shaming" A Woman And Shares His Realizations About Bullying
Royal fans gathered around Windsor Castle to witness the much-awaited royal wedding of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle last May 19, and millions of people from different parts of the world tuned in to the occasion. According to a Nielsen report, there were 29.2 million people in the United States alone who watched it live on 15 different networks. In comparison, the royal wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton in 2011 had 22.8 million viewers in the US.
It was expected that every detail of the historical event would be magnified—from the bride's gown to her hair and makeup to her jewels to her bouquet. Every little detail mattered. Every little detail was newsworthy. But eyes were not only on Meghan. One of the most notable things at the wedding was the fact that it was star-studded; the A-lister friends of Meghan gathered to celebrate her and Prince Harry's union.
The royal wedding unfolded as it should. But after the wedding, an unexpected thing happened to Meghan's Suits co-star, Patrick J. Adams and his wife, Pretty Little Liars star Troian Bellisario, at the Heathrow Airport as they were preparing to leave for the States.
On a now-deleted Instagram post, Patrick narrated what happened by posting a photo of a sleeping woman who apparently insulted him and his wife, and body-shamed him by telling him he looked "chunky."
Patrick captioned his post, “She reads her paper. See’s picture of me and Troian from wedding. ‘My God. What a terrible photo of you.’ I look over. ‘Really. I kind of like that photo. What do you think is wrong with it?’ She pauses. ‘Well, you’re just so….chunky.’ She laughs and falls asleep. And …. scene. #royalwedding."
This move by Patrick elicited mixed reactions, with some saying that he was "shaming" the woman. Adam then realized that him calling the woman out through an Instagram post was not necessary, and proceeded to take down his post. In its place, he uploaded a lengthy comment on the issue. Here are his thoughts about it:
Yesterday I posted a photo of a woman who did some casual body shaming of my wife and I in the airport. My intention was solely to put a face to the people who think that sort of glancing commentary is necessary, helpful or funny. Some of the comments on the post instead said I was being a bully and should have taken the “high road” (some also doubled down on the body shaming. Thumbs up guys!) I thought it over and agreed and took it down, not because I felt the woman was right or fair or undeserving of being called out but because any sense of being a bully or lashing out felt wrong. Now a number of familiar outlets with a lot of extra time on their hands are asking for comment and getting ready to publish the post in their hard hitting newspapers, magazines and blogs. So I’ll comment here. I’m no bully. What that woman said to us was offensive and unnecessary but I should have told her she was rude and out of line and left it at that. I’m sorry I didn’t. I was too shocked and annoyed and Canadian - so I avoided the confrontation. Again, I’m sorry. Now if you see the original post on any media outlet just know that they are choosing to take a relatively small indiscretion and make it worse. Not for me. Because I promise you once I hit post on this message it will be out of my mind forever. But it will make whatever bullying or embarrassment I might have caused for that woman far worse for a far wider audience. Now -this has obviously taken up far too much of our time and of the precious internet space that we need so much. Sorry about that. But let’s just finish with a quick summary. 1. Don’t talk shit about the way people look. You have no idea what’s going on with them and your commentary will always make their day worse not better. 2. If someone does. Don’t use the internet to settle scores. Tell them right to their face and in public that they’re part of the problem and not the solution. 3. Believe pretty much nothing you read in magazines. Good or bad. The machinery runs on misfortune and oversimplification. 4. Be cool to yourself and others at every opportunity. Life is too short for all of this. Thx for reading. Now back to our lives...
Adam explained his actions and said that he agrees any form of bullying is wrong. He apologized, and concluded the post with his realizations about the incident, summarized in four bullet points:
1. "Don’t talk shit about the way people look. You have no idea what’s going on with them and your commentary will always make their day worse not better."
2. "If someone does. Don’t use the internet to settle scores. Tell them right to their face and in public that they’re part of the problem and not the solution."
3. "Believe pretty much nothing you read in magazines. Good or bad. The machinery runs on misfortune and oversimplification."
4. "Be cool to yourself and others at every opportunity."
Photo from @halfadams