In Conversation With “Soulful Feasts” Podcaster Stephanie Zubiri

There comes a point in a person’s life when, if things aren’t going as planned, we feel as though we’ve fallen short. Sometimes, we even fall apart. 

In youth, the concept of “tomorrow,” the hope of having lots of time to improve and catch up, was a comfort. But a switch flips in adulthood and it tells us that we must hurry or make mistakes, and mustn’t go past the deadline to make something of ourselves.  

It’s a dangerous mindset to adopt; it makes us afraid, anxious, and inflexible, so much so that we forget that life is not a race, but an opportunity to keep evolving, learning, and appreciating. It’s not about attaining perfection, but amassing experiences of every kind and recognizing their value in our lives.

It takes work to rewire our hearts to believe this. But if there’s anyone who can attest to the benefits of working through life’s lowest points so that we learn this lesson rather than evade it, it’s Stephanie Zubiri. Even in periods of darkness, she believes this: 

You’re on the right path, this is where you need to be, and where you need to go

Launched in October 2023, Stephanie’s Soulful Feasts podcast tackles themes of healing and letting go, introspection, the mind-body connection, emotional housekeeping, and purpose. There, she gets candid about her real-life experiences and insights that she hopes will help others live differently for the better. Below are some of our favorite life lessons she’s shared. 

There’s no need to fix anyone. You just have to understand

When we’ve done something wrong, we feel like let ourselves down. We think we need to fix ourselves because we weren’t enough for something. Stephanie believes that it’s better to approach ourselves with self-compassion. Fixing implies brokenness; understanding ourselves opens up the acceptance that we are composed of both joyful and hurtful experiences, ideas, thoughts, motivations, and emotions. That doesn’t make us good or bad, perfect or imperfect—just different, which all human beings are. When we understand that, we can see ourselves like the seasons; they are all different yet one is not better than the others. One season doesn’t need fixing so that it can mimic the rest; it can stand on its own.  

You store grief and emotions, anger, issues, trauma in your body, and if we are not paying attention to that, then our body will start to deteriorate from inside out

Stephanie advocates caring for the connection between mind and body. When we’re upset, we tend to make poor choices (e.g.: eating more junk, moving less, indulging in a vice or two). This, in turn, feeds our upsetness; we become frustrated with ourselves, lose motivation, become even more sluggish, or spiral into more sadness over lack of self-control. She encourages all of us to break the cycle by acknowledging difficult emotions. Don’t run from them. Allow yourself to feel them and come to the surface so that you can release them. Cry and shout if you must. Do not repress and store them, as this will only hurt you further. Acknowledging that caring for the body results in a healthier mind (and vice versa) is integral to overall health.

As much as I want to say I wanna be radiant with positivity and light all the time, it’s not true, you can’t always be that way

Stephanie might exude a certain kind of lightness and brightness but she’s honest and says this isn’t always how things are—as with all people. The difference in how she handles that, however, is ensuring that when she isn’t feeling light and bright, she doesn’t dump negativity onto her loved ones. No one is ever collateral damage when she’s having an off day. If she knows she’s in a less-than-ideal emotional and mental state, she takes time to process before interacting with others. She tries her best not to overflow with negativity and expects others to absorb that excess. When we are more mindful of our effects on others, we avoid causing unnecessary hurt.

I always want to live my truth, and that means sometimes embracing the hard days, and being honest about it rather than trying to pretend

It’s not a secret that Stephanie has gone through tough times. Her split with her husband, and discovering that her youngest son Max has Autism Spectrum Disorder during the pandemic, were harsh on her mental health. Her podcast listeners have heard her get real about self-harm. Stephanie believes that by sharing difficult, even taboo, experiences, we can provide, and receive, support from others. For anyone who wishes to share, they might find that talking is therapeutic and they are not as isolated as they once thought they were. Being true to one’s experiences has more pros than it has cons.

Overall, Stephanie wishes to direct her work towards bringing people comfort. Her long-term goal is to help others help themselves, whether it’s by being an effective podcaster, acting as a role model, or, providing her followers safe spaces.

Stephanie wants to start holding women's circle, where anyone is welcome to come, talk about what’s going on with them, or just show up and cry. “Based on the energy of the room, I will guide people to a practice or a ritual to help. Beyond that, I am hoping to take more motivational speaking engagements,” Stephanie shares.

She also hopes to make her words more tangible by moving up from reiki practitioner to reiki master. Backed by years of writing experience, she also has plans to release a series of three books including a children’s book and a cookbook in the next few months.

She adds, “I’m [also] going to do a collection of a sort of essays on soulful living based on the articles I’ve written already, and nuggets of wisdom that I’ve collected throughout the podcast.” As shown by Stephanie, embracing the “bad” in one’s life can lead to good—and lots of it, too.

Listen to Stephanie Zubiri’s Soulful Feasts on Spotify and Apple podcasts:

Lead photo by @dtanph via @stephaniezubiri