This Is How You Can Heal Your Inner Child
Over time, unresolved trauma builds up and surfaces as toxic personality traits and habits which eventually lead to disease.
I’m never surprised at how the most intelligent, accomplished people can suffer the worst debilitating panic attacks, be prescribed anti-depressants and even diagnosed with a psychosis or auto-immune disease.
Knowing is a far cry from being. The mind, the most powerful tool we have in our arsenal, can either heal or destroy us. Addiction is always rooted on trauma. It comes in many forms—excessive drinking, compulsive shopping, casual sex, too much working, extreme workouts, even frequent travelling.
Familiar distractions that many of us tend to abuse to keep us from confronting painful memories that we have often buried so deep, we can’t even recall them anymore.
The mind, in an effort to protect us, will block traumatic experiences completely or find diversions. Over time, unresolved trauma builds up and surfaces as toxic personality traits and habits which eventually lead to disease.
Inner Child Therapy
“Too many children running around trapped in the bodies of grown-ups.”
The practice of inner child therapy with hypnotherapy heals childhood wounds, so that we can stop self-defeating habits as adults. It is one of the most effective ways to release us from the trauma of our past.
Saps Uttam, an Integrative and Clinical Hypnotherapist reveals that commonly, our destructive tendencies reflect our unmet childhood needs: Manifestation of deep-set insecurities that stems from our longing for unconditional love and acceptance which many of us were denied of.
Unlike Psychotherapy which primarily relies on cognitive behavior analysis, inner child therapy guides the patient into a dream-like state to tap into their subconscious which reveal’s one’s innermost truths. This is called the Theta stage.
To start, Saps interviews her patient to understand their story and their lifestyle. This allows her to create a personalized program. For the initial meetings, Saps encourages her clients to open up with talk therapy. Not everyone meditates and a lot of us have difficulty letting go, so for most people, it takes a few sessions until they are ready for hypnotherapy.
Saps shares that we all have inner children. They can be compared to key memories that still holds a lot of emotions because it was never acknowledged, processed and healed. Pieces of our being scattered and buried deep into our mind, forgotten but never released.
Inner child therapy with hypnotherapy allows us go dive into our subconscious to finally meet these abandoned children (aspects of ourselves) so that the adult in us can give them the assurance and compassion that they were denied and finally lay the issue (trauma) to rest.
A successful session leads to a breakthrough: A cessation of substance dependence, the end of an abusive relationship, reconciliation with family and in some cases new opportunities.
Every case is different and each person responds uniquely to the therapy. It is encouraged that before signing-up that the patient trusts the process as the success of the practice depends on their willingness to be vulnerable.
When to explore inner child therapy?
You’re anxious… a lot. Anxiety is fear of the future because of lack of trust.
You feel depressed. Depression is always brought on by past experiences, mainly as a child.
Stuck in an unhealthy relationship? How others relate to us is a reflection of how we are. We project our insecurities and fears on other people. The more we do inner work, the better our relationships become—mirror.
How to care for the ‘lil one in you:
Be thankful. Gratitude is the great multiplier, whatever we appreciate replicates. Similarly, whatever it is that we fear also gravitates closer. Put your attention on what makes you feel good and there will be more of that. Ignore the opposite. Your energy is your currency; use it, grow what’s good, and starve what isn’t.
Meditation is the art of quieting the endless chatter of the mind. The practice is not only proven to alleviate stress, it is also known to promote feelings of serenity, ease and contentment.
Journaling is a constructive outlet for our emotions. Writing down what we are grateful for, what we want our future selves to know, and what we are feeling is in itself therapeutic and also serves as bookmarks of how much we are growing.
Nourish your soul with good food and make sure you’re hydrated. We can’t expect to feel our best if we’re wasting away with alcohol, sugar and processed junk.
I am worthy.
I am loved.
I am beautiful.
Words of reassurance that never has to come from someone else. The body has ears and responds to whatever it is you say to it, so speak kindly to yourself and do it often until it becomes part of your reality.
Set gentle boundaries not walls. Draw a line from a place of self-compassion and share that. Shutting down or snapping coldly because you feel threatened leads to feeling even more isolated and misunderstood. You can speak your truth and be kind, brutal honesty is a lazy way out.
Take control of your life. Acknowledge that your happiness is your responsibility alone, yes other people may have hurt you but it is your job to heal and grow from those experiences.
Practice forgiveness. When someone hurts us once, our mind relives it countless times. Why do we continue to punish ourselves for somebody else’s mistake? Break free from the torture of your mental prison by not holding on resentment. Take back the power from those who wronged you by moving on. We pardon not because they’ve earned our forgiveness but because we deserve to be happy.
Follow @innerglowbysaps on Instagram to know more about Inner Child Therapy and to book sessions either at your home, or at partner centers.
Photography by Ronan Capili